I am opening a vulnerable place in me for the first time in a while…
I have always been a dreamer, an optimist and a romantic in a world that often wants straight lines, cold-hard facts and constant quotas.
Did you know that Depression affects approximately 14.8 million American adults, or about 6.7 percent of the U.S. population age 18 and older in a given YEAR? ATTENTION: That is just in one year.
A world where people eat out of boxes, work a living in a box to earn rectangles to buy a square house and then wonder why they feel de-press, op-pressed and trapped in their lives.
Why are people just pretending to be happy in these boxes, in this narrative?
Are there people who are really happy living that cookie cutter life?
A world that values one mans opinion over his own truest heart knowing, that is basically what Science has turned into. A world that values feeling void statistic that flat line our existence into not asking anymore questions but in shouting opinions and case studies at one another.
It pains me to watch so many people hand over their inner guidance to words on a piece of paper.
That is what happens in a world dominated by the patriarchal mind, the intuitive feminine guidance is ruled out as being quackery. I know that there is also fact in human feeling though. A hundred years from now hopefully we as a society will have discovered this as fact again. Uncovered like the irrefutable placebo effect.
I feel the older I get the more illusive it is to find people who truly understand how to live in this world without the feeling that they are obligated to do something and without the feeling of underlying suppressed deep suffering.
And yes, I feel it even in everyday conversation.
How’s the weather?
Well it is sunny but I feel a downpour of wounded child oozing from your chest, wanna hug it out?
Sometimes I feel like a bird who is tirelessly flying above a world that is filled with dark, scared and lost beings.
I think that is how I have learned to hold myself so dear without needing anyone else to tell me why I am here. I have forged my focus into my personal purpose path. I have learned, to smile in the darkest of times because I knew the darkness could never smother an illuminated heart.
Even if you fall, you can choose to focus on the fact that you are on the ground to rest, to learn and try again. After all, you were made to walk and when you are strong enough you will jump, run and dance.
You are infinite energy and when you use this power of mind, body and spirit to it’s passionate path, miracles happen. You can create whatever you want in life.
I feel there is a real extreme with people that are suppose to be like me “spiritual people” or the “awakened communities” that are arising. Those who choose the festival route, to party and take drugs, to “raise consciousness”. But drugs have always made me feel uncomfortable energetically, drugs have always felt messy and emptying to me, I have never needed them and doubt I ever will. I do understand there are powerful plant medicines to open and heal others. I just wonder if there are others who have always been sensitive like me without needing any influence?
(I have always dreamt of teaching people how to access this place within their mind without drugs, yes it is possible.)
Then there are those who are here to create “light” on the planet, to “heal” people. The healer, I have met many. Yet all I feel around these people is this very heavy and intense sense of deep suffering and mourning in their warrior like inner fight to create the New Earth. It is like they are carrying the world on their shoulders thinking this is going to save humanity when it is inspiration, self-liberation and illumination of the heart that will change the world!
When you liberate yourself, you liberate the world.
The way to get out of a bad outcome is by creating a solution that is very light, joyous and freeing! That is how this should feel in my opinion, I wonder if other people agree.
If you go to a healer shouldn’t they not be dragging you into the depths of a lower vibration. Over and over again. What is there? Oh yes, more pain. How does that even make sense. Mhmm, we are healing this burn with fire.
Wait, come again?
I think a true healer knows that the light within a person can effortlessly bring people to graceful release, cleansing and healing trauma into a higher vibration of happiness, joy, remembrance and empowerment!
I understand that pain must be released but honestly, I remember a place without suffering. A place where your heart was pure, I feel mine has so much peace when I am in my center. When I am not surrounded by the mental turbulence of the suffering people of the world. These gorgeous lost souls are why I keep on my mission, just by being me. It is what I have wanted since i was four.
Everyday I want to learn how to integrate this medicine I have inside, this medicine of laughter, joy and celebration, of feeling light into hearts around me.
Sometimes people are not ready to accept this opening heart medicine though and so I have to land from this flying feeling and cry with others, for their deep release here in this plain of existence, for their emptiness and feelings of being lost, not remembering who they truly are.
I just want someone to celebrate with!
I will forever be an empath and an perpetual idealist.
I will forever be a mirror.
I hope to find someone like me one day…
Mostly, may all beings be released from suffering and may they know that they are the answer to that prayer.